Dancing Robins
by AkamaiHigaku
Summary: Series of one-shots of Robin dancing to silly songs.
1. Chapter 1

[Mount Justice: June 29, 15:30 EDT]

It was quite obvious to the young partners that they are bored out of their minds. Wally glanced around and sighed, Connor was watching static again, Megan was trying to bake again, and failing miserably, Artemis was doing her math homework, Kaldur was reading a book about fish and Robin was hacking into the League systems again. Wally suddenly leaped up and made a happy noise as he remembered something, using his speed he ran from the room, returning literal seconds later with a karaoke machine and the largest, stupidest grin ever. Robin looked up and gulped "Really Kid Idiot?" he said with a faint hint of fear in his voice. Wally, in turn, said "why yes, Boy Blunder, really!" Artemis looked up and sighed "I can't sing you idiot" She stated sharply, Wally's face fell. He had this great idea but everyone was ruining it.

Robin saw the dejection on his face and sighed "Okay, we'll do it" this made Wally perk up and Artemis growl at Robin who smirked and said "Blackmail Artie-moose, I have enough to last years! Plus, I'm willing to get Roy involved as well if you take part." The mention of Green Arrow's former protégé made Artemis perk up, she eventually agreed. Robin somehow managed to bribe Roy into coming and participating. They went through the entire team minus Robin who jotted down the songs and the singers it went a bit like:

 _ **Wally- Bad Romance by Lady Gaga**_  
 _ **Roy- What U See (Is What U Get) by Britney Spears**_  
 _ **Artie- Bad Blood by Taylor Swift**_  
 _ **Megan- Never Close Our Eyes by Adam Lambert**_  
 _ **Connor- Final Countdown by Europe**_  
 _ **Kaldur- Under the Sea from The Little Mermaid**_  
 _ **Robin- Tik Tok by Ke$ha**_

That is how, dear friends, we got into the position we are now. Robin is resisting Wally's effort to make him sing, Artemis and Roy are threatening to shoot him with arrows, Megan is attempting to bribe him with cookies, Connor and Kaldur were hanging back. Suddenly, Batman strode in followed by the rest of the League. Everyone snapped to attention until the Leaguers sat down, followed by their protégés, everyone except Robin who was holding a silent conversation with the Bat. He seemed to have lost, as he sighed and growled "Fine but if you dare laugh I will tell Agent A about the time you nearly burnt down the kitchen while trying to make coffee" everyone snickered at this, only to be met with a half-hearted BatGlare. Robin walked up to the lightswitch, dimming the lights a bit, only keeping one above the coffee table lit up. Wally rolled his eyes and prepped the video camera, he knew the Boy Blunder could sing damn well but hated to admit it to anyone.

The teams watched as Robin stepped up to the coffee table { **Robin: STAGE!** } wearing a glittery version of his suit with no legs and a sparkly fedora and mask. He tapped his booted feet against the table as the backing track to the song started, his hips began swishing and he smirked. Everyone was completely captivated by the boys hips, legs, and mouth as it curled into a smile and opened. His voice stunned them all, he sounded exactly like Jesse McCartney, he began to sing the lyrics to a parody of Tik Tok.

 _Wake up in the morning feeling like Winehouse. (Hey, what up girl?)_  
 _Grab my breezer, I'm out the door_  
 _I'm gonna be really loud,_  
 _Cause I don't care who I piss off_  
 _Yeah, I'm a real big sinner._  
 _Sometimes, I eat my dessert before my dinner._

His hips were swaying in such a way that it should have been illegal, he ran his hand down his body, and twerked a bit as he spun around, turning his head to face them, eyes hooded and looking ever so sexy.

 _I'm talking odd socks on my toes, toes_  
 _Taking off all my clothes, clothes_  
 _Feeling overexposed,_  
 _So, I put all of my clothes, uh, back on..._

 _Flush before I wee, wee._  
 _Get arrested daily, ly._  
 _Tryin' to get a peek of some titties..._

He grinned and slut dropped a bit and leaned forwards before flipping off the table onto the back of the couch the league was on and strutted across that, hips swaying. His smirk in place as he ran his hand down Flash's front, biting his lip, and moving onto Lantern. Hal Gordon suddenly had a hand running it's nails down his front, a small, lithe body in his lap. They watched as Robin then moved onto Green Arrow's lap, laying there and hooking his leg around his neck, pulling himself up. He smirked and flipped onto Canary, grinding against her before hopping down and strutting over to Superman and Wonder Woman, they all watched him slut drop and twist his hips enticingly. He was still singing

 _I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad._  
 _Pucker up, kiss my butt,_  
 _Cause I'm bloody fuckin' nuts._  
 _Hear the bass, skinny waist_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like,_

 _Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh._

 _I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad._  
 _Pucker up, kiss the nut,_  
 _Cause it sells to be a slut._  
 _Hear the bass, skinny waist_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like,_

 _Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh._

He moved over to the team, Wally gulped as Robin ground against Connor, leaving feather light kisses over his jaw and throat. Wally then had to watch as Robin gently kissed Kaldur and nibbled on Megan's neck. He fully straddled Artemis' lap and slid up her body, then back down, ass sticking out. Roy was next as Robin ground against his lap, elicting a throaty moan. Wally smirked but it fell as Robin strutted over to him, his jaw dropped as Robin twisted his hips, slut dropped and ground against him teasingly. His voice had a hint of laughter in it.

 _I stay out 'til eleven when my curfew is ten._  
 _"Goodnight, sweetie. Sleep well."_  
 _"Shut up, Mum! I'm on MSN!"_  
 _Now, the girls are lining up_  
 _Because we're pussy sailin'_  
 _But we punch 'em in the mouth if they're not Sarah Palin._

 _Talkin' 'bout doing things we'll regret, gret,_  
 _Menthol cigarette, rette_  
 _Butt plugs in his pet!_  
 _Woah, woah, woah..._

At this Robin held his hands up and twisted his wrists.

 _Text sex on my Samsung,_  
 _Not telling Dad Mum rung, rung,_  
 _Have sex with Alexa Chung_  
 _By telling her I'm well hung._  
 _(I'm-I'm-I'm quite well hung.)_

 _I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad._  
 _Pucker up, kiss my butt,_  
 _Cause I'm bloody fuckin' nuts._  
 _Hear the bass, skinny waist_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like,_

 _Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh._

 _I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad._  
 _Pucker up, kiss the nut,_  
 _Cause it sells to be a slut._  
 _Hear the bass, skinny waist_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like,_

 _Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh._

The next bit he sashayed over to Batman and climbed into his lap. He bit his lip and turned around, grinding himself on his dad's crotch before bending down, ass in the air as he placed his hands on the floor. He flipped onto his hands and walked easily to the makeshift stage again, standing up to finish the song.

 _This is the part where the rap breaks down,_  
 _This is the part where drums go POW,_  
 _This is the part where your balls sag down,_  
 _This is the part where you pants go brown,_  
 _This is the part where your dad goes out on a cold Christmas Eve to get some more milk but he never comes back because seventeen years later you find out he's had a whole fucking_  
 _family with some Spanish bitch and he doesn't even know your fucking name anymore!_  
 _Shut the fuck up!_

 _[Crying] I'm sorry..._

 _I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad._  
 _Pucker up, kiss my butt,_  
 _Cause I'm bloody fuckin' nuts._  
 _Hear the bass, skinny waist_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like,_

 _Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh._

 _I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad._  
 _Pucker up, kiss the nut,_  
 _Cause it sells to be a slut._  
 _Hear the bass, skinny waist_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like_  
 _Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh._

 _Just Dance!_  
 _Bad Romance!_  
 _Now let's copy Pokerface like_

 _Woah oh woah oh woah oh woah oh oh_

Robin finished with a sultry twist of his hips and a pout. Batman smirked and began clapping "Well done Robin. Remember, the more provocative you are the more likely that someone I need to take in will steal you." He then turned and left. Everyone stared at Robin who was beaming in pride of being complemented. "Dude," Wally said "Never do that again."


	2. Chapter 2

Robin was bored. _**Robin**_ was _**bored**_. He was hanging about in the Watchtower, Batman had been called back to Earth so Robin took over monitor duty and it was safe to say he was completely, out of his mind, ready to scream bored! He started tapping his leg against the chair, then he started jiggling, he looked around and once he could confirm no one was with him, it was a situation that the whole League was called to deal with, he screamed loudly feeling a whole lot better afterward. He stuck headphones in and turned his music up all the way so you could faintly hear it from his headphones. He hummed along as he browsed the world wide camera system the Watchtower came with, he found Kid Flash at home doing homework so he peeked at what he was doing, he smirked the maths homework was named 'Multiplying Binomials'. He called Wally on his communicator and spoke with a scarily convincing southern drawl, female of course, "Maths Homework Help Service, how may I help you today Darlin'?" Wally looked shocked before he whined, "Roooobbbbbb Help me!" Robin let out his signature cackle before replying "Okay calm down, lucky for you I can help you do this. First, multiply the first terms. Yup like that. Then, multiply the outside terms, yep like that. Next, multiply the inside terms. Mhm! Lastly, multiply the last terms. Good! Now the equation you should have for that question should be ( 6x2 + 3x - 8x - 4 ) = 6x2 - 5x - 4. Correct? Good! See, perfect. Anyway gotta go now, bye!" he hung up before Wally could beg for help.

He chuckled evilly and then realized he could do what he wanted, he began playing a random song from his playlist through the Watchtower speakers, he backflipped his way to the meeting room and burst in. He smirked at the empty space and hopped up on the table. He began dancing around, singing perfectly and loudly

 _My heart is paralyzed_

 _My head was over sized_

 _I'll take the high road like I should_

 _You said it's meant to be_

 _That it's not you, it's me_

 _You're leaving now for my own good_

He bounced on the balls of his feet as he grinned, swishing his hips like a cheerleader, making a split second choice to become a cheerleader. He returned within moments, still singing, wearing a cheerleader uniform and carrying pompoms, mask still in place. Leaping back onto the table he sang as he hopped around, brandishing his pom poms everywhere in an actual routine.

 _That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are I'm gonna say_

 _She went down in an airplane_

 _Fried getting suntan_

 _Fell in a cement mixer full of quicksand_

 _Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes!_

 _She met a shark under water_

 _Fell and no one caught her_

 _I returned everything I ever bought her_

 _Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies_

 _And ways to say you died_

He smirked and flipped a bit, still singing, his voice carrying beautifully. He cracked up halfway through the next verse.

 _My pride still feels the sting_

 _You were my everything_

 _Some day I'll find a love like yours (a love like yours)_

 _She'll think I'm Superman_

 _Not super minivan_

 _How could you leave on Yom Kippur?_

 _That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are I'm gonna say_

 _She was caught in a mudslide_

 _Eaten by a lion_

 _Got run over by a crappy purple Scion_

 _Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes!_

 _She dried up in the desert_

 _Drown in a hot tub_

 _Danced to death at an east side night club_

 _Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies_

 _And ways to say you died_

 _I wanna live a thousand lives with you_

 _I wanna be the one you're dying to_

 _Love, but you don't want to_

 _That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are I'm gonna say_

 _That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are I'm gonna say_

By this time he hadn't even noticed the Zeta Beam announcing the arrival of the Justice League. They stood around smiling at the happy music, only Batman could really pick up on his wards voice. They all followed Batman to the meeting room, stopping in the doorframe.

 _She went down in an airplane_

 _Fried getting suntan_

 _Fell in a cement mixer full of quicksand_

 _Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes!_

 _She met a shark under water_

 _Fell and no one caught her_

 _I returned everything I ever bought her_

 _Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies_

 _She was caught in a mudslide_

 _Eaten by a lion_

 _Got run over by a crappy purple Scion_

 _Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes!_

 _She dried up in the desert_

 _Drown in a hot tub_

 _Danced to death at an east side night club_

 _Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies_

 _And ways to say goodbye_

He finished with a flourish and turned, blushing heavily at the sight of the group in the doorway until Batman began clapping slowly, followed by the rest. Robin hid under the table, taking the mask off to become Dick Grayson. They watched as Batman took his cowl off to become Bruce Wayne. He knelt down and opened his arms, laughing as his ward ran into his arms, nuzzling close. He kissed his head "You did good Dickie" he smiled as a small blush appeared on the boy's cheek "I'm so proud of who you've become son, _I love you_." Dick looked up and said quietly, yet the others could hear it, " _I love you too daddy._ " He yawned making Bruce chuckle, putting the domino mask on his wards face and putting the cowl back up he swept out the room as Batman, holding his little ray of sunshine tight to him. Because even large, scary, glaring, brooding Bats had bedtimes.


End file.
